Unattainable Stars

From time to time you pop in and I’m
Reborn again
Walking out of the baptismal waters feeling anew
Mind, body and spirit on hyper speed
Cosmos aligned, speaking to me
Intelligent conversations, and some about the freakishly way a cow looks when it walks
You get me
Then hide again
It’s like reaching from here for a star then realizing how dreadfully unattainable that is
Leaving me to settle for a starfish
I mean, who has ever held a fallen star anyway
We’ve seen them, wonder where they go and wish we could have caught it
You couldn’t just be a figment of my imagination
Because how do you come and go?
You could never remain
That would be too obvious
So not you, yet
The feeling is just. . .addictive
Yeah
Like pupils dilated
I await your pop in like a fiend who thinks he found a rock in the carpet addictive
Some just know what’s not good for them, yet they smoke it anyway
Sometimes I just want to burn

(C) KonciouSLea Written, and yes. . .I’ve discovered that I’m really freaked out at the way cows walk.
7/30 NaPoWriMo 2015


I don’t know

if I’ll be a part of the uprising when it happens but I’ll agree with it when it does
Because they don’t ever attack real niggas
Street niggas
The ones who pack that heat niggas
The ones with nothing to lose who will clap back instead of run over a broken brake light niggas

This will never make sense to you because you will never be that target/ed nigga
The one pulled over because to them you ARE a nigger
The one who rides with his boys for fun blasting music nigga
“Breaking the noise ordinance during the day” nigga

It’s like no matter what you do you’re wrong nigga
They don’t need a reason to pull out on you nigga
The bullet’s the new noose in the tree for us niggas
And who is really fearing for their lives niggas?
It’s not like these cats got 9 lives niggas
Or we all walk around with them packed 9’s nigga

I hope I live to see the uprising when it happens I’ll agree with it when it does
Clap like I did when OJ got off nigga
Blast Ice T’s album Cop Killer in my car for niggas
Relive my teenage years with NWA screaming fuck the police during the riots nigga
Then pour out some liquor for Rodney and say I guess we can’t all get along after all my nigga

As long as they just see us as a number or nigger
As long as the undertone is still we don’t represent a whole. . .go figure
As long as we Kanye shrug because, “I’m glad that wasn’t me my nigga”
As long as we be the type to turn the other cheek my niggas
There will always be a rise from the cradle to the grave
Cops will always disrespect us as something man made
They will never know what defines or pride
Until then my niggas, I’ll await the uprising

(C) KonciouSLea Written with a lot of n-words but truthfully, it’s about time
(To be edited more later)
for NaPoWriMo 2015 6/30


Now I Knew I Lost Her (2013) inspired by Emily Dickinson

Now I knew I lost her
200 + miles apart with decisions teetering upon the high wire
Not that she was gone
for my mind always dwelled there
But Remoteness travelled
On her Face and Tongue.
The truth in her like the word of God
And I, Alien though adjoining
As a Foreign Race from here to there like time travel
Traversed she though pausing
Latitudeless Place.
Elements Unaltered unwavered and unforgiving
Universe the same
But Love’s transmigration made us one
Somehow this had come out and felt unscathed
Henceforth to remember
Nature took the Day
I had paid so much for the regret and shame of a damaged love
Shackled in my own Penury
Not who toils for Freedom
for decisions made were undeserving of
Or for Family
But the Restitution
Of Idolatry to behold

(C) KonciouSLea Written as in tandem pen with Emily Dickinson
For NaPoWriMo 2015 5/30


I remember the denial of being that way

In fact, just the mention of it sent me leaving footprints engraved into a mountainside
The quest for the nearest cave
I’d become a hermit and hide
One would find me alone
Warring with my feelings

“…and who am I to shackle anyone who would fall”

My own insecurities keeping me imprisoned on an island gated from the depths of an abyss to the nearest cloud
The cloak I’ve worn, a shroud of pain Weighted in regret
This thing I longed for, but where would I begin?
Within
The acceptance of who I am
The feeling of knowing that I can be me
Then the confirmation that she accepts the same

Me
The whole me and nothing but me
Inside and out
How can I not accept that, when my insides reveal an ugliness that I can’t even stand
She, envelops this man in a warmth bright enough to ruin all darkness
Its a joy worth singing about
Not only that
I can admit that I’m in that way

(C) KonciouSLea Written without saying that word
For NaPoWriMo 2015 4/30


Young Buck

A child that’s left on his own is bringing shame and reproach
To one who leaves him alone, suggest that you listen close
The one to whom I refer is she who brought him to earth
Bore pain just to give him birth, but he don’t know what life worth
She did her best just to raise him, teaching him right from wrong
But trust, it won’t be too long, he’ll fiend to sing a new song
He was the light of her life, but now a thorn in her side
This is the pain that she hides until she lies down and cries
Why did he choose a new path, this is the question she asks
Her mind is boggled, confused as he just stands there and laughs
Constantly high on lean, he’s selling crack and gang banging
This boy, young in his thinking, to her speaks a new language
Of course he’s got to be anxious to get out on his own
But he’s just reaching 15, Young Buck is thinkin’ he’s grown
Full blown, feels the effects, her heart beats faster and faster
No longer handling stress, soul is sent to her master
So we can call this disaster all messed up from the start
Because another mother dying from a broken heart
The reason, because of one who wanted more than he had
The reason, because of one who didn’t know what he had
The reason, because a mother let her son just get wild
The question, what would you do, tell me if this was your child? 

(C) KonciouSLea Written with today’s youth in mind. . .still
For NaPoWriMo 2015 3/30


Starstruck

We just happened to be two polar opposites destined to collide
Amon-Ra and Demeter present at our births
Our celestial Godparents
They would guide us toward one another and assure fertility
Just as they did in times past
…and we would concede
Unknowingly
At the same time willingly
It is likened to the impact made between comet and earth
Heaven and earth combine and create a event longing to be seen
And declared more than incredible

KonciouSLea Written
NaPoWriMo 2015 2/30


Driven Thoughts

I guess it’s too late to live on a farm
I guess I have country in me somewhere
I guess this 47 mile drive to and from work won’t persuade me
I guess this winter will end and corn will grow soon
I’m guessing I’ll never go into a cornfield alone…or stare too long into one
I’m guessing pigs don’t wear Tim’s or J’s
I’m guessing roosters don’t pack 9’s to jack the pigs for them
I’m guessing the coroner don’t have to come around often
I guess there is no hawk on hawk crime
I guess that smell isn’t death
I’m guessing my son would gag from the smell
I guess he may wonder why that lawn jockey is so black
I’m guessing I’ll teach him about Jocko Graves
I guess I’ll include the underground railroad as well
I’m guessing these public schools omit that from curriculum now-a-days 
I guess finding a needle in a haystack is really hard
I guess with my luck I’d get stuck
I guess Animal Farm was really about politics
I’m guessing I’d get more out of reading it as an adult
I guess George Orwell was a quack genius
I guess I’m not the only one corny
I guess we could have a field of sunflowers
I guess that would be beautiful to see
I’m guessing that would lead to farming more things
I guess that would be another thing on the honey do list
I’m guessing that would take me from writing
I guess there are no slam poets screaming in barns
I’m guessing I won’t slide the door open to see
I guess that would make my day to find one
I guess she would have a lot to say about words scraped into the walls
I guess we would share homemade lemon aid and talk about how peaceful it is there
I’m guessing she’s written about injustices
I guess I may have a silent protest in reflection on my way home

KonciouSLea Written because the drive to and from work is truly thought provoking and. . .I’ve gone there. 

KonciouSLea
for NaPoWriMo 30/30 2015
1/30


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